How NOT to read the Bible
One thing that I’ve seen many people do (both Christians and non-Christians) is to quote Bible passages out of their context. This week Steve Bell uses the medium of humor to help us see why it is important that we read the Bible in context. While the article is humorous, it does raise some serious issues about how we use the Bible. – The Page Editor.
The biblical breakfast cereal:
“Sustain me with raisins” Song of Songs 2:5a
Insulting:
“Your father was an Amorite and your mother a Hittite” Ezekiel 16:3b
”Yet you have the forehead of a whore; you refuse to be ashamed.“ Jeremiah 3:3b
“Every man is stupid and without knowledge” Jeremiah 51:17a
“Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead!” 2 Kings 2:23b
The point of University?
“Of making many books there is no end, and much study is a weariness of the flesh.” Ecclesiastes 12:12b
Against Evangelism:
“The faith that you have, keep between yourself and God” Romans 14:22a
Children, eat your vegetables!:
“Eat whatever is set before you without raising any question on the ground of conscience.” 1 Corinthians 10:27b
But not your hands:
“The fool folds his hands and eats his own flesh.” Ecclesiastes 4:5
Guys don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses:
“Leah's eyes were weak, but Rachel was beautiful in form and appearance.” Genesis 29:17
But!:
"Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching men.” Luke 5:10b
Paul invites himself over:
“At the same time, prepare a guest room for me, for I am hoping that through your prayers I will be graciously given to you.” Philemon 22
What to write on greeting cards:
“Though I have much to write to you, I would rather not use paper and ink.” 2 John 12a
Catchphrase:
“Cush fathered Nimrod; he was the first on earth to be a mighty man. He was a mighty hunter before the Lord. Therefore it is said, ‘Like Nimrod a mighty hunter before the Lord.’” Genesis 10:8-9
Sexist Jesus:
“Woman, what does this have to do with me?” John 2:4
Jesus with bad breath:
“whom the Lord Jesus will kill with the breath of his mouth” 2 Thessalonians 2:8b
Threatening Jesus:
“The words of him who has the sharp two-edged sword. 'I know where you dwell…’” Revelation 2:12b-13a
The Earth is the center of the Solar System:
“He set the earth on its foundations, so that it should never be moved.” Psalm 104:5
And to finish:
“Greet all the brothers with a holy kiss. I put you under oath before the Lord to have this letter read to all the brothers.” 1 Thessalonians 5:26-27
All quotations are from the ESV (English Standard Version). To find out more about the Bible and how to read it well, come to Mid-Year Conference!
[Stephen Bell]
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